Catalyst
by princessjoey630
Summary: After arresting a member of a notorious street gang, Ziva's life is put at stake. Can Tony accept and reveal how he truly feels? Tiva. Somewhat OOC. Rated T to be sure.
1. Chapter 1

A/N I dedicate this to my Not-Stalker (love her so much).

DISCLAIMER: I don't own NCIS, but now I also own a deb dress pattern. Score!

Enjoy!

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Chapter 1

"I'm just saying, he was a crew member. You probably didn't need to threaten to entire gang when all you had to do was handcuff the guy," Tony said as they sat at their desks.

Ziva smirked slightly. "It was barely a threat, and after two months, we finally got Hector José. His gang should know that we are after them as well."

Tony stared at her for a moment. They had been working that case for a while, constantly trying to catch a lead on a major drug ring that was connected to a series of stabbing murders. After attributing the ring to the Mala Halo crew, all they had to do was wait for a leak or for someone to screw up. Then, within days, Hector José had been caught distributing their substance near one of the undercover NCIS agents strategically placed in the area.

At the bust, they had apprehended José in the middle of a crowded street, surrounded by Halo members. After a somewhat violent scene with José, Ziva had said quite clearly, "One down, about 40 to go."

That hadn't pleased the Halo's leader very much, being 'threatened' on his own turf.

Tony couldn't help but be impressed by his partners lack of anxiety when surrounded by some of the most brutal gang members in the country. By now, he was used to it, but occasionally it caught him off guard.

"Fair point, but even a little threat can go a long way," Tony said.

Ziva laughed and turned her attention to her paperwork, allowing Tony to stare at her some more.

He'd never mentioned it to anyone, but he did find Ziva quite attractive. And smart. After working with her for three years, he was certain that she was his best friend...maybe even something more...

"DiNozzo, David, take this down to Abby," Gibbs said as he walked into the squadroom. He handed an evidence bag holding a knife they'd found at the bust to Tony. "See if she can link this to the murders."

"On it."

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They walked into the lab arguing. "I'm just saying, stereotypically men protect the women in society," Tony said.

"Stereotypes are not always correct," Ziva countered.

Abby watched as they walked in. She loved her co-workers like family, and was rather fond of the idea that they meant something more to each other.

Finally they noticed her presence. "Present from the boss," Tony said, handing her the evidence bag before moving so he was standing in front of Ziva. "So you've never needed protecting?"

"No."

"What about when you called Gibbs out of retirement. Wasn't that so he could protect you?"

"That was not protection. That was him finding out who framed me-"

"So he was protecting you from federal charges."

"Let it go, Tony," Ziva said, sidestepping him so she was in front.

It seemed to happen in slow motion. All three of them heard two loud gunshots, but only two of them looked to window where they came from.

Ziva stumbled backwards slightly before falling completely, landing awkwardly on her side.

"Ziva," Tony said immediately. He fell to his knees next to her, examining the damage. Blood was flowing from her side and her neck, and he could feel the blood spray on his face.

He turned to Abby. "Get the medics," he said, even though she was already dialling. She looked as though she was in shock; just staring at the motionless person on her lab floor. She also had blood on her face, but not as much as Tony.

He reached up and grabbed a spare lab coat that was on Abby's desk and used it to stem the bleeding. From the look of it, Ziva was going in and out of consciousness every few seconds. "Ziva, stay with me," he said quickly, not knowing whether she could hear him. "Abby-"

"They're on their way," she replied just as urgently. She had seen her share of gunshot victims, but never here, in her lab, and never one of the co-workers.

Tony continued to work on Ziva, desperate not to let her go.

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A/N Review!

There are three chapters to this fic...this was more of an introduction compared to the other two.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N Thanks for all the reviews!

Again, this is for my Not Stalker. And Phoenix, because he puts up with me.

Enjoy!

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Chapter 2

They sat on a plastic bench outside Ziva's room. Just minutes ago she had come out of surgery and been wheeled in there.

Abby finally broke. "I can still…feel her…b-blood on my…f-face," she said between tears, leaning over so her face was buried in Tony's neck.

An involuntary tear spilled from Tony's eye as well. He glanced at his hands. Blood was now drying under his fingernails, something which would have ordinarily creeped him out, but now was not the time to worry about it.

The doctors had said nothing that would give them any hope – always a bad sign – and they weren't even allowed in to be next to her.

He couldn't think of what to tell Abby. 'It'll be alright'? 'She'll be fine'? These things were hard enough for him to believe himself, let alone convince someone else.

He could see Ziva through the blinds. Just lying there, blissfully unaware of the situation. He kept waiting for her to sit up, giving him the usual 'You are so gullible' smirk. Instead, she remained motionless, as if hovering between life and death, unable to just go one way or the other.

In a way, Tony found himself wishing that if Ziva was going to die, she should have died instantly, like Kate. Quickly, painlessly. Kate had been smiling when she died, something which Tony sometimes took comfort in knowing. Instead, Ziva was left to suffer, making the rest of them wait for a doctor to emerge and say those fateful words along the lines of "We're sorry, but there was nothing we could do."

Tony turned so he could put both his arms around Abby.

"You scared about her too?" she said into his shirt.

"Terrified," he replied quietly. "She's my partner."

"Ziva means more than that to you and you know it," Abby said forcefully, pulling away from him. "Now is not the time to keep these things inside."

"Abby…"

"Don't 'Abby' me. You know I'm right."

Tony paused, remembering how Abby had dealt with the last gunshot in her lab. Sure, no-one had been hit that time, but she did have a tendency to react in strange and different ways. Clearly, this was one of them. "Ziva's my best friend, you know that. I trust her with my life," he said.

"Did you ever tell her?"

"Tell her what?"

"That you love her."

Tony stared at her. "Abby-"

"Don't say you don't, because I know all. I see all, I hear all, and I draw my own conclusions. You're always staring at her across the squadroom. I've seen it, don't deny it," she added as he began to argue. "For people like you, you need a catalyst. Something to make you do it. As bad as this sounds, this could be it."

Tony gaped. "I never said-"

"That's okay. I already know. Now you can-"

"Abby, Ziva is in there, fighting for her life, and all you can think about is me telling her how I supposedly feel?" Tony said incredulously.

"You either tell her now while you have the chance or you might never be able to," she replied simply. "I'll distract the nurses while you go in," she added, walking off.

Tony sat frozen. He couldn't do this. Not now. Not just because Abby had decided that he should.

"_You either tell her now while you have the chance or you might never be able to."_

The words had a strange effect on him. The thought of never being able to talk to her again was petrifying.

There were so many things he wished he could have told Kate. He knew it was no use now, but he still thought about it sometimes. He would have told her his frat brother had thought she was beautiful. He would have told her sorry for stealing her tuna fish sandwich and taken her out for a replacement.

She was like a sister to him, and then she was gone.

He couldn't let that happen with Ziva. She meant more to him than anything. He just hadn't done anything about it.

The next thing he knew, he was standing in her room, his hand twitching to hold hers.

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A/N Hope you liked it!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N Sorry for the slow update! Issues with out internet...I really hate our phone company.

Anyway, here's the last chapter! Enjoy!

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Chapter 3

Tony woke to the sound of Abby's voice.

"She's still sleeping...one bullet nicked her jugular, the other went through her side and did minor damage. The surgeon said the surgery was successful, but she was incredibly lucky...yeah...he's in with her now...it was a Mala Halo?...okay, we'll see you soon." She hung up the phone and went over to where Tony sat next to Ziva's bed. "Gibbs and McGee got the guy. Member of the Mala Halo on his own revenge mission."

Tony blinked groggily. "Revenge mission?"

"For Ziva's threat and arresting Hector José."

"How the hell did he get into the Navy Yard?"

"Found a breach in security. Like Mikel all those years ago," Abby explained. She had managed to get a level head by now. "Gibbs and McGee'll be here soon."

"Great." Tony was still quiet. He didn't remember falling asleep, but he did remember surrendering to himself and taking Ziva's hand, where it still sat now.

Ziva had moved since he had last looked at her face; last time her face had been facing the ceiling, now it was facing him. Her eyes were closed, and she was breathing slowly and evenly.

"The doctors told me she is really lucky to have such a small amount of damage," Abby told him. "It could have been so much worse."

"Yeah," Tony replied, still staring at Ziva's closed eyes.

Abby noticed his distraction. "I'm gonna go call Timmy," she said, leaving the room.

Tony had seen Ziva sleeping before, but this was different. This time she looked weak, vulnerable. In the pale blue hospital gown she looked even skinnier than usual, and the drip in her arm didn't help the image.

"I don't know what to say to you," he said quietly. "I can't believe this happened. You hear of people getting shot all the time, but this…this is different. Not because it happened in the lab but because it's you. I'm sure something like this has probably happened to you before, but it's still different. I don't think I've ever felt the way I felt when you fell to the ground. And I never want to feel like that again. The thought of losing you forever…it's terrifying." He paused, as if waiting for her to respond. "I don't think I've ever felt like that about anyone before. I've lost partners before, but like I said, this was different."

Abby's words continued to circle around his mind. _"You either tell her now while you have the chance or you might never be able to."_

After taking a deep breath, he continued.

"The reason I've never felt this way about my other partners was because I wasn't…I wasn't…I wasn't in love with them. But…I love you." There. He'd said it. "It's probably completely pointless to say it now since you can't even hear me. And it's stupid that this had to happen to make me say it. And when you wake up I'll have to say it again which will be even harder." He gripped her hand tighter, before bringing it up to his face, placing a light kiss on her knuckles. "Just get better, Ziva. That's all I can ask of you."

A noise in the doorway distracted him. He turned, only to find Gibbs, McGee and Abby all watching him. McGee looked surprised yet strangely pleased, Abby looked like Christmas had come early, but Tony was most worried about his boss. As usual, his expression was pretty much unreadable, but Tony could see that Gibbs wasn't about to explode at him for breaking at least one of his rules.

Instead, Gibbs put his hands on McGee and Abby's shoulders, leading them away from the room.

Tony turned back around to see Ziva looking at him intently, a weak smile on her face. "Ziva," he breathed, before remembering their hands. He almost dropped hers, but she reached over and held them together, still looking directly at him.

"How are you feeling?" Tony asked, completely rattled now that she was awake.

"I heard you," she said, not answering his question, but posing another one.

"What?...oh," Tony said. "You…you heard that."

"I was resting my eyes. I was not sleeping," she said, still smiling.

Tony suddenly realized how close they were, within mere inches. As if by instinct, he went to move away, but she caught him again and moved her hand to his face, drawing him closer than before. He completed the action by closing his eyes and leaning even further, pressing his lips again hers and holding them there for a moment, which became even better when she reciprocated.

They drew apart, then Ziva moved so her face was over his shoulder, and he was the same for her. His hands were now wrapped around her, holding her loosely enough that nothing hurt, but tight enough that she felt secure.

"I love you too," she whispered into his ear. "And I will not leave you here alone, at least for as long as I can help it."

Tony laughed lightly. "Thank you."

Abby had been right. Don't hold back if you need to say something, or you could lose it forever. And if you do do it, you might be pleasantly surprised.

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A/N Hope you liked it!

And how awesome is the NCIS soundtrack?! I've been listening to it all morning (on the website).


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